Heidi G karlsson

I didn't want to be on facebook. And when I did, I made all my settings super private. And then I said "NO" to lots of people who wanted to "friend" me. And then when I did add people, I ERASED THEM. Not all, just some. I wanted facebook to be just for me and my family.  Know why? One reason is, I want to know you in real life. I don't want your facebook life. And you don't want mine either. I tend to post super cute things that my kids say. Oh and they are brilliant. You do need to hear those things. ( I actually post those things so that when I make our yearly photo album I'll have cute things close at hand to make the book all the more memorable to us). But I would never post the fact that I just got told I was a dumb mom and that my son hates this family and never wants to be here again, my precious son who has autism and we are just learning how to work with him and we fail multiple times daily. And when we have no money, I'm not go...

I don't like birthdays because I feel like it is friendship report card day. Every year I get nervous. I don't think anyone will come. I have had some great birthdays over the years, and I think I have some great friendships. But it still doesn't add up.  I don't remember when I first started being afraid of the birthday party. When I was 16, my parents threw me a surprise party and invited my school AND church friends. I didn't have the social skills or wherewithall to enjoy myself. But I can remember even further back, being 10 maybe, and inviting some kids - but very carefully because there were these 3 girls that always hung out and I often felt left out and fought with them. So I only invited 1 of the 3. Or 2. And I told them so: "You guys aren't nice to me when you're together so I'm not inviting you all." Duh. Don't know why I cared so much. They were never my friends. I have always longed for deep, real and satisfying friend...

Yes, I have been. Chasing blogs. Tell me if you read any that you love. See, I have been shocked. I understand the value of blogging. It's like external journaling and you get feedback. Somehow some people get paid to do it. If I could I would. I think you have to be willing to opinion a bit more and dialogue with people who hate or disagree with you. I think you have to let people call you bad names and use it as fuel or to help you see you are doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing. Maybe one day. Back to blogging - I have been searching for blogs worth reading. I'm sure there are some. I find some person then I find out they are famous, then I research them, and OH, wouldn't you know it.. scandal attached to their name. Not just like people calling them heretics, I'm fine with that. But bad stories people want to hide. I don't know what I'm looking for. I'm trying to replace facebook. What I should really do is go to the library and take out so...

I was walking across the street... the crosswalk. The little white man was lit up indicating it was my turn to go. No blinking red hand, no solid red hand. All signs were a "go." A car decided to turn left right in front of us. Did I mention I was not alone? NO. 4 children with me. Two in the chariot, 1 walking and 1 riding his bike. So this car turns right across our path. Ok fine. She wasn't looking but we were barely getting started across. No harm, no foul. Then the white van behind the car follows suit. Or tries. Only problem is, now we are mid cross walk. I am not a road rager. I am not a yeller at strangers. I respect people's space. It's probably pride, but I try to keep things under control and not lose control. But these are my babies and that van driver is an idiot and we are about to get hit, so I yell, "WHAT ARE YOU THINKING!!!" I raise my hands and wave and try to put my body between my kids and the van coming towards us. Lady looks up. To...