Little white clouds dotted the sky. We walked. The sun was already set, but the light had yet to fade. I talked. I listened. Up the hill and back. What is it about us that it means so much to have another one of us look at us, nod, listen to us, then share them with us. Why when my dreams scare me do I want to tell somebody, when Sparrow says something funny do I have to tell somebody . . . and all I need is for something in their face to communicate that what I said meant something, made sense somehow, or was valuable to them. Sometimes I wish I could truly look into God's face and see how He responds to me. My prayers. My thoughts. My attempts to impress Him. My attempts to run from Him. The times I run to Him. I'd like to see Him nod. Smile. Wink. Oh man I'd love to see Him wink at me. I'd smile for a whole week straight. I wouldn't be able to stop. Winks make my heart flip. Unless the winker is scary... but let's say it's all good. No slime. I hope He winks at me when I get to heaven then I will know everything is going to be ok. Imagine the judgment. You know Jesus blood covers you completely and that's all you're going on. However it works, you know the stuff - every idle word, all that stuff - giving account. So some angel is reading a lengthy list of idle words and you dare to look at God, and ... he winks. I'd think I'd died and gone to heaven. Sorry. Couldn't resist. I know as humans we are sinful and we sure mess things up a lot. But There is something so beautiful about us too. Maybe it's the fragile/beautiful paradox. Our goodness is so pathetic, but when we accept that and just love because there is nothing else TO do, it's painfully majestic. A gentle spirit. Anyway, the clouds dotted the sky and we talked. Humans. It's good. You know?

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