Run for Turtles

Today I went for a run.. walk.. walk and stop... a time of discovery with my 4 year old. It was such a beautiful day and I am trying to get out more. Outside. In the sun. With trees and water and dirt... and stuff. Four year olds are great for that. The other day it worked pretty great to run while my little girl rode her bike. When she goes fast, I can barely keep up. When she goes slow, I catch up and find my breath again. 

It was fun, for a while. And then we saw the park benches - with names on them. Every 20 feet. And she wanted to read the names on them. Then there was a bug on the path. Then there were some birds in a tree. A squirrel. Now we are looking for frogs. The sign says no bikes on the floating bridge, so she gets off and walks. Not impressed though. Other people pass us on their bikes. We have a good talk. And then, there it is. A baby turtle five feet from us. Exciting. And then, oh LOOOOOK!! there are 4 big turtles out there on a log. We stay for probably 20 minutes before we move on. It’s glorious. Dragonflies. A little fish. A little boy who wants to say hi. And the baby turtle keeps showing up as if he is following us. Magical. 

My run? Not so much. We hit a playground. Then another. Then she needs to go to the bathroom. Then there is a nest, and a dog to pet. Another dog to pet. Then she wants to say goodbye to the turtles.... which are on the other side of the lake. I’d WAY rather not, but it’s turtles. How often do we see turtles? So we go find the turtles away (plus maybe I’ll finally get in a bit of a run?? yeah? you think?).  By this time it’s almost been 2 hours. She’s tired. We’re late for lunch. We get back to that bridge and she falls on the ground sobbing. ‘WHY CAN’T I RIDE MY BIKE! WHY DID THEY SAY THAT!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” Inconsolable. 

I look around. Anger flows through my veins and my muscles are flexed. Heat comes up the back of my neck. FAILURE! WHAT A FAILURE! THIS IS WHY WE DON’T TAKE 4 YEAR OLDS FOR RUNS! WHAT A WASTE OF TIME! SHE’S NOT EVEN THANKFUL. LOOK AT HER!

Then something else fell. Peace? A calm? Not a failure. Look at her. ( Ilook at my little girl). She’s seen turtles. And she’s been outside with you for 2 hours. and you’ve run. Not like a trained athlete but like a kid who’s alive and having fun. No schedule. Nothing to beat, nothing to achieve. She’s just tired. Not failure. Success. I pick her up, and her bike. She’s still sobbing but she wants to do it herself.. ride her own bike. A blue Heron hunts bugs and fish 10 feet from us. We stop with the others who are watching. The crying stops for a minute and then I say, “we need to go.” Cue the sobbing and all the strangers sympathetic stares ( I think). We ride and run back to the van. I get the seatbelt on her and whisper in her ear “the baby turtle was my favourite.” She stops crying and whispers “me too.” 

When we get home we eat food and draw turtles. 

It’s not about failures, but about time. 


Comments

mdb said…
I haven't seen the turtles yet. I bet it was awesome!
8:31 AM
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